Morgan Park
Companion Squad, a creation by Steam user Triget, serves as the backbone for an ambitious campaign that unfolds in the realm of gaming. With just a couple of keystrokes, an army materializes on screen—30 mercenaries, each with distinct identities, stand poised for action. The gates of Kuttenberg lie before them, wide open, with its unsuspecting guardians unaware of the impending assault.
Step 2: Call in favors
A glance at the “Heroes” section of the spawn menu reveals a treasure trove of allies. With a few more clicks, Henry’s companions and adversaries alike are summoned for a quick favor. Notable figures such as Hans Capon, the Jan Zizka crew, Godwin, Erik, Istvan Toth, and even Radzig and Hanush make their way from Rattay, bolstering the ranks to a formidable 43 soldiers, ready to reclaim Kuttenberg in the name of King Wenceslas.
Step 3: I have no pants
As the scene shifts to photo mode, a comical realization strikes—Henry is inexplicably pantless. This peculiar oversight, a result of transferring the save to a newer PC, leaves him without his padded hose. Nevertheless, the respect of his men remains intact, a small consolation amidst the chaos.
Step 4: Charge!
The city guard, unamused by the sight of an unsheathed sword, engages in a brief skirmish. The warband, dubbed the “murder clump,” swiftly dispatches the guard in mere seconds. However, the army’s initial defensive stance means they only engage when Henry is actively threatened. Adjusting their attack pattern becomes imperative for a successful coup.
Step 5: Overwhelm
At last, the murder clump transitions into an offensive force, launching an assault on Kuttenberg’s guards. The element of surprise works in their favor, as the guards, caught off guard, are quickly overwhelmed. With the eastern entrance cleared, Henry joins the fray, charging toward city hall.
Step 6: Accidentally become the bad guys
As the chaos unfolds, the murder clump begins to attack indiscriminately—nobles, innkeepers, and musicians fall victim to the rampage. Attempts to control the situation prove futile as the army fractures into smaller units, each operating with ruthless efficiency. What was intended as a military coup devolves into a chaotic ransacking, reminiscent of the turmoil that plagued Henry’s life in the original Kingdom Come: Deliverance.
Step 7: Apologize to God, or something
By nightfall, the streets are eerily silent, stained with the remnants of the day’s violence. Seven soldiers have perished, and Henry, nursing his own wounds, finds himself in a somber room with a shrine. A moment of reflection leads to a heartfelt apology for the senseless loss of life.
Step 8: Take office
In the next room, an imposing office beckons. Henry takes a seat at the grand desk, effectively crowning himself the ruler of Kuttenberg. While the mission is accomplished, the repercussions are severe—countless quest givers lie dead, and the townsfolk now seek retribution for his actions. Despite the swift resolution of the coup, the path forward is fraught with challenges, leaving Henry to navigate the consequences of his hastily executed plan.
