The Maw has once again consumed Edwin. After a brief interlude in the news beast’s digestive system last October, Edwin had instituted new safety measures. The guidelines now dictate a strict no-petting policy for The Maw, feeding it exclusively with a standard six-foot news pole, and ensuring that all dental care is conducted by a certified animal dentist specializing in eldritch care. Unfortunately, CCTV footage revealed that Edwin fell victim to The Maw’s deceptive gurgles, which eerily resembled the phrase, ‘Can I tell you a secret?’. In a moment of curiosity, he leaned in, only to be swallowed whole. We anticipate his emergence from the creature’s gullet just in time to cover The Game Awards this Thursday.
In the wake of this incident, the proper traditions were upheld. Mark performed The Last Post on his kazoo, while James updated the ‘Days since last accident’ whiteboard in the coffee room, erasing the ’56’ and replacing it with a ‘0’. A respectful silence enveloped the room, momentarily interrupted by the ping of the microwave announcing the completion of my porridge.
Upcoming Game Releases
As we approach the festive season, the gaming landscape remains vibrant with several exciting titles launching this week:
- Skate Story: Navigate the Underworld on a quest for freedom, all while skating towards the moon. However, be cautious—your character is made of glass, making any misstep potentially fatal.
- Yakuza 0 Director’s Cut: This expanded version of the prequel to the renowned Yakuza series introduces a Red Light Raid multiplayer mode, enhancing the experience first released on PC in 2018.
- Cat Named Mojave: Perfect for those who enjoyed last week’s Horses and seek a dash more of animal-headed, human-bodied horror.
- Liminal City: Tailored for players who desire a horror experience devoid of human presence, though spider-like creatures lurking in car parks add a chilling touch.
Additionally, the following titles are set to make waves:
- Death Howl: This game merges deck-building mechanics with soulslike elements, featuring a chart on its Steam page that outlines how it meets the criteria of both genres. Expect a stylish descent into a wasteland teeming with eldritch horrors.
- Milano’s Odd Job Collection: The localized release of Milano no Arubaito, originally launched in Japan in 1999, invites players to relive the experience of childhood labor exploitation through various summer jobs.
- Unbeatable: Set in a world where music is banned, this rhythm action game challenges players to host illegal gigs and resist the state. A review will be available later this week.
In a unique twist, Anxiety Puppy presents a visual novel that tackles the daily anxieties of urban living. While the developers claim this theme is unprecedented in gaming, the initiative to address mental health is commendable.
This week also marks the early access launch of Ashes of Creation, an MMO that promises an evolving world. Developers emphasize that players should expect frequent and significant changes as they explore a realm where they can trade, capture, or defend player-developed settlements.
Lastly, Terminator 2D: No Fate offers a pixel-art rendition set around the events of Terminator 2: Judgement Day, conveniently disregarding the 8-bit tie-in game from the 90s. This new title recreates iconic scenes from the film while introducing fresh narratives that unfold in the shadows of the main action, akin to the concept of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead.
While this week may be relatively quiet in terms of releases, those with an appetite for news, much like our esteemed Maw, can anticipate a bounty of stories from tomorrow’s Wholesome Snack and the upcoming Game Awards on Thursday night.
